by
Cappy Hall-Rearick

"Where has the time all gone to
Haven't done half the things we want to
This day was just a token
Too many words still unspoken
Oh well, we'll catch up some other time."
Betty Comden and Adolph Green

   Entirely too much time has passed since I visited the mother of my first childhood friend. I look at the diminutive woman seated across from me and marvel that at eighty-four years old, her unlined face shows not a trace of sorrow or sadness. Her smile is wide, her eyes brighter than mine, her laugh a violin that lightly plucks the strings of my heart.
   "I remember the day we first laid eyes on you," she says, as a mischievous glint appears in her eyes. Thus begins a story told and retold for most of my life, yet one I never tire of hearing.
   "Your family had just moved to town," she grins. "but we hadn't met. My chirren were in the back yard playing when all of a sudden Dickie let out an awful scream. Like to scared me to death."
   She looks at me, shakes her head and in a pretty good imitation of two-year-old Dickie, says, "Huh hit me on my head wit' th' cat!"
   Contrite even after all these years, I feel the color of embarrassment crawling up my face.
   "Law, I looked up to where the child was pointing and saw YOU for the first time. When I asked who you were and where you came from, the other kids said you just happened up."
   She cocks her head to the side and purses her lips into a tight smile. "I was trying to figure out what to do when I saw a lady walking toward the house. It was your mama, of course, looking for you. Child, you were just a baby, yet you crossed that big street all by yourself when you heard the other kids playing 'cause you wanted to play, too."
   I was three-years-old then and from what I've been told, it would not be the last time I wandered off from the home fires. "So how come I hit Dickie with that mechanical cat I've been hearing about all these years?"
   She shakes her head. "Who knows? You had it. He wanted it. You had no intention of giving it to him. But that was the day you and Peggy became such close friends. Most people thought you were cousins. And your mama and I became friends for life, too."
   This beautiful lady sighs contentedly and shifts slightly in the straight-back chair, a necessity since her lumbar surgery. This nearly imperceptible movement is as close as she will come to a complaint of any kind.
   We speak of family, hers and mine. We talk of my grandchildren and her grands and great grands. She digs out a shoe box full of wedding pictures and babies born to people I have yet to meet. She tells me how happy she is in her new living space at The Home and how lucky that she has a screen door she can open to create a nice cross-breeze.
   We don't talk about Peggy, my very first friend, gone now these seven years. The pain is too raw for us both. My gaze drifts from time to time to the same picture of Peggy that sits on my desk at home, but still, neither of us broaches the subject. Instead, I ask about Peggy's youngest son.
   She laughs out loud. "He'll never change. Why, he could pee on your foot and make you believe it was raining." She laughs some more. "But he'll yank the shirt off his back and give it to you if you say you like it, and hug you so hard you'll beg for mercy."
   So much like his mother, I think, which cause me to draw in a breath. "He was in Seattle with Peggy when she went for her bone marrow transplant. So was I. That boy was so concerned about his mother. We all were."
   My other mother looks down quickly and I fear I've opened a wound not yet healed and am immediately remorseful. She looks back up at me and for a moment, we share the depth of our sorrow and our need for closure.
    "My Peggy was such a brave girl. Just hated giving up. Because of her, we all learned a thing or two about courage, didn't we?"
   I catch my breath again and hold it inside. I do not want to cry in front of this stalwart woman who has buried a son, a daughter, a husband. Who only three years ago survived the incredibly invasive Whipple Procedure for pancreatic cancer. Who smiles at and speaks to every person she meets while pushing her walker down the narrow hallway of The Home. I know precisely where Peggy got her courage.
   Stooping down, I give her an awkward hug and a kiss on her rose petal cheek. "I'll come back to see you soon," I tell her.
    "Well then, we'll catch up some more another time," she says.
   Only when the door closes softly behind me do I allow deferred tears to bathe my sad, sad soul.

Once upon a time there was a rich King who had four wives.

He loved the 4th wife the most and adorned her with rich robes and treated her to the finest of delicacies. He gave her nothing but the best.

He also loved the 3rd wife very much and was always showing her off to neighboring kingdoms. However, he feared that one day she would leave him for another.

He also loved his 2nd wife. She was his confidante and was always kind, considerate and patient with him. Whenever the King faced a problem, he could confide in her, and she would help him get through the difficult times.

The King's 1st wife was a very loyal partner and had made great contributions in maintaining his wealth and kingdom. However, he did not love the first wife. Although she loved him deeply, he hardly took notice of her!

One day, the King fell ill and he knew his time was short. He thought of his luxurious life and wondered, "I now have four wives with me, but when I die, I'll be all alone.

"Thus, he asked the 4th wife, "I have loved you the most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?"

"I cannot!", replied the 4th wife, and she walked away without another word.

Her answer cut like a sharp knife right into his heart.

The sad King then asked the 3rd wife, "I have loved you all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?"

"No!", replied the 3rd wife. "Life is too good! When you die, I'm going to remarry!" His heart sank and turned cold.

He then asked the 2nd wife, "I have always turned to you for help and you've always been there for me. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?"

"I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!", replied the 2nd wife, "At the very most, I can only send you to your grave." Her answer came like a bolt of lightning, and the King was devastated.

Then a voice called out: "I'll leave with you and follow you no matter where you go." The King looked up, and there was his first wife. She was very skinny; she suffered from malnutrition and neglect.

Greatly grieved, the King said, "I should have taken much better care of you when I had the chance!"

In truth, we all have 4 wives in our lives:

    Our 4th wife is our Body. No matter how much time and effort we lavish in making it look good,
it will leave us when we die.
    Our 3rd wife is our Possessions, Status and Wealth. When we die, it will all go to others.
    Our 2nd wife is our Family and Friends. No matter how much they have been there for us, the
furthest they can stay by us is up to the grave.
    And our 1st wife is our Soul, often neglected in pursuit of wealth, power and pleasures of the world.

However, our Soul is the only thing that will follow us wherever we go.

Cultivate, strengthen and cherish it now, for it is the only part of us that will continue with us throughout Eternity.

___________________________________

I thought you might enjoy 12 things you should never, ever say if you want to be happier. All of these statements violate universal laws, which follow them in parentheses. In addition, each statement creates a mental picture that works against what you want, making it more difficult to reach your goal. Following each statement is a second statement that removes energetic resistance so you can get what you do want.

"I don't have time for this!" (As you sow, so shall you reap.)
Instead, try "I have five minutes, and I can get this much done."

"I wish there weren't so many negative people around me." (You attract what you are, not what you want.)
Try, "There are a lot of negative people here, but Tony always makes me laugh."

"That chocolate cake looks fabulous, but I can't eat it or I'll gain weight." (What you resist, persists.)
Try, "Chocolate cake is fattening, which is why I'm going to take a small piece and savor every bite."

"My whole family's fat." (Wherever you go, there you are.)
Try, "My family overeats, but I'm learning how to control my portions."

"It's his fault--he should have turned in the report on time!" (Whenever there is something wrong, there is something wrong in you.)
Try, "Blame never helped anyone. Is there something I could have done to help him get the report done on time?"

"I found $10 in my coat pocket today, but that isn't going to take me very far."
(Whatever you do may be very insignificant, but it is very important that you do it.) Try, "Finding an extra $10 is a treat. I can use it for something fun, or turn it into a seed for my first million."

"He drives me crazy, but I love him anyway." (You can't think two things at the same time. )
Try, "Love means never having to feel confused."

"I'll never get that promotion." (If you believe something to be true, you will demonstrate that truth at some point.) Try, "It's tough to get a promotion around here, but I feel confident about my ability to lead and succeed."

"The boys were crazy about me in high school." (You can't go home again, but you will try.)
Instead, try "I loved being the center of attention in high school, but now I enjoy deeper connections with one person at a time."

"I always fall asleep in front of the TV " (When you focus on your life, good things happen.)
Try, "I'll watch the program with my family, and then climb into bed early and get a good night's sleep."

"I keep getting my heart broken in relationships." (The more things change, the more they remain the same. )
Try, "I've had my heart broken, so I'm ready for something better."

"You're so negative, I don't know how you exist!" (What you put in, you get back. )
Try, "You're obviously having a tough time. Your sunshine is hiding!"

Remember: winning words work wonders. What comes out of "the horse's mouth" is what you are living. Pay as much attention to your thoughts as you do your clothes, hair and makeup, and freedom is yours.