Welcome!

THE CAT'S MEOW is a free weekly newsletter.
If you've received it, you've subscribed or been given a subscription,
or have had it forwarded to you by a friend.

To subscribe or unsubscribe, please follow these links:
SUBSCRIBE
UNSUBSCRIBE

Please feel free to forward any part or all of The Cat's Meow
to your friends, either in e-mail or printed form!!

Let The Past Be Past

Is it difficult for you to forgive? To let the past be past? It is for me. Nearly impossible sometimes. I'm a little like the elderly Virginian woman who lived to see her beloved Richmond occupied by Union troops after the American Civil War. The matron was walking down a Richmond street when she tripped over a step and fell. A Union soldier courteously helped her up.

The Rules

Sometimes we need to remember what the Rules of Life really are.

1. Never give yourself a haircut after three alcoholic beverages of any kind.

2. You need only two tools: WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't, use the duct tape.

3. The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship are "I apologize" and "You are right".

4. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

5. When you make a mistake, make amends immediately. It's easier to eat crow while it's still warm.

6. The only really good advice that your mother ever gave you was: "Go! You might meet somebody!"

7. If he/she says that you are too good for him/her: believe it.

8. Learn to pick your battles. Ask yourself, "Will this matter one year from now?" "How about one month?" "One week?" "One day?"

9. Never pass up an opportunity to pee.

10. If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You have another chance!

11. Living well really is the best revenge. Being miserable because of a bad or former relationship just might mean that the other person was right about you.

12. Work is good, but it's not that important.

13. And finally, be really nice to your friends and family. You never know when you are going to need them to empty your bedpan.

THE CAT'S MEOW would love to hear from you!
We welcome all purrs, hisses, articles you've written or
enjoyed (please include the source!), and suggestions for
new features on the website or in the newsletter!!!
Send them to the editor!

Visit Our ARCHIVES for all issues of The Cat's Meow!

www.the-cats-meow.com is now online!
We hope you'll find our new domain name shorter and easier to remember...just look at the masthead of any issue to remember our name (and use the computer mice as hyphens!)

We have many new features on our website. Especially for webmasters, we now have the Cat's Meow's own Daily Cat Quotes for websites, and for YOUR reading enjoyment: Famous Quotes.) Be sure to see our new Marketplace, which features kitty jewelry, cat stationery, cat puzzles, gift baskets for kitties and their humans, cat kitchenware, clothing with cats, cat quilts, cat art prints and posters, cat beds, cat gyms, natural cat foods, and the charmingly nostalgic Kit Cat Clock! We now even have cat checks! You'll also find a wide selection of cat books, and specially-designed videos to entertain Kitty while you're away.

Cat - Human Translator

'HERE KITTY, KITTY, KITTY...'
Means humans want to take you somewhere, most likely the Vet. Avoid it.

'I HAVE SOMETHING SPECIAL FOR YOU!'
Probably left over human food they were about to throw out.

'HERE'S SOME KITTY TREATS...'
Most likely another foil wrapped appeals-to-a-human Madison Avenue concoction. Real kitty treats are usually opportunities when no one's paying attention and you get to lick the ice cream in the bowl, or jump on the table for that great piece of meat loaf.

'YOU ARE SOOOOOO CUTE!'
You are about to rub noses with a human. They can never get enough of our tiny fur- coated bodies and irresistible faces. Human noses are sooo warm. Ugh.

'YOU'RE IN MY CHAIR!' or 'YOU'RE TAKING UP TOO MUCH OF THE BED!'
You picked the right spot. You are right where you should be.

'DARN CAT HAIR!'
You left your hair out in the open where humans can see it and properly clean it up.

'STOP THAT!'
Means you were caught. Remember exactly where you were and get back to it - once they leave the house.

'GET OUT OF HERE!'
Do not take this personally. It's usually the first thing they say after you wake them up by sticking your backside in their face.

SNAPPING OF FINGERS:
They want you to come over. If they want me, they'll come get me. Otherwise, get a dog.

If you'd like to share The Cat's Meow,